Gimme horror!

Why hello again my website of useless rants. I've seriously missed you coz' I haven't been myself in the past few days. I visited Candy Mag yesterday, and I admit it, I missed hanging out in there. That was where I met my Bee, Bru and all the other girls that I now call friends. Although, it was depressing to see that my stories rotted in there. No one seemed to care anymore coz' I kept breaking promises on the updates. I now promised myself to finish everything before posting so as to avoid future disappointments. As we speak, I'm brainstorming ideas for a new story that I'm writing. However, this story is different. It is in the third-person point of view, and it is like a book when you read it. No more color-coded conversations and different points of view. I wanted to try something new and this is what I want. 

Moving on, I should be studying for my accounting midterms today but laziness got the better of me. I will fight this off later on. :)) I still desire to be a BSA major someday. :D And yeah, I wanted you to know that I will get my Dean's Lister certificate tomorrow at the Vice Dean's office! I shall cherish this because this might not happen again. :))) JK. 

K SHIT. I don't know what else to say. My life is as boring as it is. I don't have a guy to love, no friends to be mad at and definitely no family problems. Sometimes I wish that a problem may come so my life will be less boring. :| :| :| 

Before I forget, I suggest that you refrain from watching White House! It was a complete eyesore. O.o 

I gotta stop typing now. Waiting for the download of Shutter so I can watch a horror movie worth watching! 

Love you guys! :) 

30 things you MUST know about me. :)

READ THIS! <3

• 1.     I’m messy. If you could see my room, it always seems like a storm hit and messed it up. Nope, that’s not the case --- I did that mess all by myself.
• 2.     I studied in the US of A when I was in Kindergarten. White stockings and an awesome dress to school rocks! >:D<
• 3.     I used to think I was a good singer. I actually attended Center for Pop Music classes. Unfortunately, reality hit me and I finally realized that I made my listener’s ears bleed.
• 4.     I had my first crush in Kindergarten and I still remember his name and his face. Kevin Carrerra. :”>
• 5.     When I got back from the US of A, I didn’t know how to speak Filipino. I learned to speak the language again when I became a grade school student.
• 6.     I can’t count how many planes I’ve ridden.
• 7.     I am in love with horror movies but I easily get scared. I’m the type of girl who likes to close her eyes when she knows there is something scary that is about to happen, but opens it in the exact time the scary thing reveals itself. 
• 8.     I only have one crush at a time. And when I say I have a crush on you, that’ll last til’ you lose your face or you do something that will turn me off.
• 9.     I hate smokers but I have loved one and my bestfriend smokes. So this is kind of ironic.
• 10.  I won the title of 1^st runner up, Ms. Woodhills when I was in grade 4. I paraded around my subdivision, waving like a professional beauty queen. I swore that I will never do that again. It was totally embarrassing.
• 11.  I lived in Davao City for almost 3 years. I studied in Ateneo De Davao and it was awesome.
• 12.  Despite my long residency in Mindanao, I never learned the Visayan language.
• 13.  I’m afraid of the dark. I don’t sleep without a night light on. In the past, I couldn’t even sleep alone in my room. But when my sister moved to Katipunan, I was forced to deal with the fact that I was to sleep alone in that room. (with all the lights on)
• 14.  I was a “batang-kalye” when I was a child. I would play patintero, moro-moro, Chinese garter, and the like, in bare foot. I didn’t like wearing slippers, but when I acquired a worm in my stomach, I started to wear my slippers more often.
• 15.  I never imagined I would study in De La Salle University. I always believed that I would pass the UPCAT. But my intelligence failed me. :|
• 16.  I’m a nerd, but I’m so lazy when it comes to studying subjects I’m not interested in.
• 17.  I had a dream wherein I was placed in a coffin because I died (DUH), and I was watching my loved ones react to my death. (WEIRD KO)
• 18.  I used to finish my assignment quickly so I can watch Scooby Doo. (I was easily manipulated when it comes to Scooby Doo. :D)
• 19.  I cut class when I was in Grade 3. It was for a stupid reason, actually. I thought it was already lunch time, when in reality, it was only recess. When I finally realized I was wrong, classes had already started. I didn’t want my teacher to scold me so I roamed around the school, avoiding the guards. >:)
• 20.  I’m a PSYSC kid, and always will be. <3
• 21.  I’m the type of person who sacrifices for friends and exchanges her happiness for another person’s happiness.
• 22.  I believe in Hoes Over Bros. Friends before those useless boys. >:)
• 23.  I have never gone to the cemetery on the exact day of All Souls Day (Undas). There are a lot of people and I can’t handle that.
• 24.  I used to think a ghost lies down an empty space in a bed, so I always scatter my pillows so all the empty spaces will be covered. Scratch the I USED part. I still believe in this! Swear! :))
• 25.  I like to go biking, but some people won’t allow me to ride my bike because of safety reasons. :|
• 26.  I like to write stories but it bugs me when people read it. It makes me awkward because I know my writing is not that good.
• 27.  I like to watch teleseryes. I currently watch Survivor, Grazilda, Ilumina and Beauty Queen. In the past, I was very much addicted to Encantadia. :) <3
• 28.  I get easily irritated, I just don’t show it.
• 29.  When I have PMS, you’d wish you weren’t my friend. HAHA. MEAN. :)) >:)
• 30.  I was very bored so I did this, and because I love Bee. :)

Infatuation

I am the worst blogger known to man. I have been re-opening this site for the past few days and I still can't type anything. It's like I lost my ability to write about anything since ----- never mind. And the only reason I'm typing in this blank textbox is because I'm waiting for Episode 6 of The Vampire Diaries to load. This is the lowest of the low. :| If you could only see me right at this very moment, you can say that I look crazy. I'm looking around my vacant living room to think about what to tell you and nothing comes to my head. I've been thinking about things to write in this useless blog all week, and yet I still have not come up with one.This is so irritating. 


Oh, a random thought entered my mind. Why don't I tell you how stupid I've been when I was in high school? Okay, it's not in the context of academics, ayt? It's in the fact that I let myself love two guys that did nothing but use me for their own good. Okay, I know that's exaggerating, but as I think about it now, one word comes to my mind --- INFATUATION. 


Yea, one guy gained a three-year infatuation but the other one lasted for only about 8 months. I mean, why would I love them? I couldn't even think of reasons on why they sliced deep into my heart. :| 


So there were times when I thought I loved them. Lemme' give you a list. 


Boy 1 
> He managed to make me cry by the church and risk letting my 2 bestfriends and a classmate see. 
> He made me act like there was nothing wrong in front of him, when deep inside I was crying. I did it only because I didn't want him to think that I got hurt. 
> I hate smokers but when I learned that he was smoking, I let it pass. WTF?! 
> I only got jealous twice -- with different girls. His bestfriend and his current girlfriend. :| 
> I used to text him ILY when I get drunk. Stupid right?
> I have this feeling in my stomach whenever he's close. It's like I have a radar in my body. :|
> I used to wait for his text every millisecond of the second.
> I used to blog about him a lot ---- okay, until now. 
> Even though I hid him from my news feed, I tend to look at his profile everytime I go online. :| 
> I try and try and try and try to forget about him but I haven't succeeded in that. :| 


Boy 2
> He makes me cheer up with a simple HI. :) 
> When I see his name on my cellphone, I tend to jump and squeal in delight.
> He made me cry on this year's JS Prom. :> Don't ask why. 
> He always makes me feel so special. 
> I get jealous on all the girls that he is with. WEIRD. 
> Right now, we're texting each other. 


OKAYYY. As you can all see, Boy 1's side is mostly composed of all the pain that he inflicted upon me. HAHA. Don't blame him, I made this happen. Ako lang naman tong tanga na pinipilit ang hindi naman mangyayari. Yea, I blame myself for this. If  had been brave enough before, I could have been saved from the heartache. Boy 2, on the other hand, is full of happiness. And this only proved to me that I was only infatuated with Boy 2. Looak at all those sentences. Those are all what you feel when your crush texts you, right? This sucks bigtime. 


Any, I've been blabbering for that past few minutes. I think I should get back to the thing I was watching so I can sleep early! We're going to the province tomorrow! :> 


Happy birthday Patricia Domenique Briones Gumban! :> :> 


With Love, 

October Madness

Guess I haven't dropped by here in over a month now. I was busy with school and the like. Err, scratch that. I wasn't really busy, I just didn't have anything to write. My life's been boring ever since I became a college student. Yes, I've drank alcohol, cut class, and walked from Padre Faura to Vito Cruz. It's fun, but everyone knows I'm the type of girl who is too much of a good girl than  bad girl. Everything bad I did didn't amuse me. It's like I lost my fun bone in my body. Everything's screwed up coz' I don't know how to have some serious fun. Sometimes I wish I was in highschool again. The time when I didn't care if my grades were down or if having fun meant breaking the rules. I was careless back then and right now, I got a lot of questions in my head. "Will doing this mean that I won't be able to enter the BSA program?", "Will this affect my studies?" I know I sound like such a nerd but ughhhh, I feel like that right now. :|

SH1T. I NEED TO GET A LIFE.

So, It's October and I got a lot of people to greet. My brother, Anton, coz' he's celebrating his 8th birthday, Pat and Chat, my college friends, for their 17th and 16th birthday, respectively. :) And yeah, his birthday's also coming up and I'm still thinking if I should greet him or not. Haha. Sometimes, I wished my birthday was on this month so my birthday and Christmas gift wouldn't be the same. Hahaha. I sound so selfish. :)) 

My parents are here, so I gotta go. Cyber huuuug! :"> >:D< ♥

I died.

I died and he didn't care. It was my usual dream. This wasn't the first time that I saw myself lie in a coffin and watch people cry over my body. I know you may think I'm weird but the reason why I dream about this is because I think about it before I sleep. What if I die, will he cry? That was my usual question. And everytime I dreamt about that before, he didn't care. He would go to my wake but he would just smirk. Not once have I felt that he valued my life. This time, the dream was different. He came to my wake with his girlfriend in tow. Surprisingly, there were tears in his eyes. Tears that weren't just for a show. He neared my coffin and whispered, Akala ko ba di mo ko iiwanan? Sino na ang magmamahal sa akin ng walang hangganan? I love you, Reena. And I regret not telling you in person. Once he said that he let go of his girlfriend's hand and straightened up. Once he turned his back at the coffin, for a second, I thought he looked straight at my ghost. He winked and smiled. 


HAHAHAHAHAHA. CRAZY DREAM NO? :)) This all came right after I visited UST last Friday. I saw Cito, Reymarc, Rochelle, and Tari. :)) Cito looked like a stoner(JK), Rochelle became more beautiful, Tari grew taller and Reymarc, well his hair grew longer. I missed them and apparently, a single Friday isn't enough. I shall visit them again! :) 


Sh1t. I have loads to tell you but I need to sleep. :| I'm very sleepy naaa! :D 
Enjoy this post. I shall post a long one on Wednesday for I will study for Accounting and College Algebra tomorrow. 

To Rant or Not To Rant?

This is me, thinking of nothing to blog about. I mean, I've been like this for the past few months. Ganito pala nagagawa sayo ng walang lovelife no, wala kang malagay sa blog. Believe it or not, my life is generally peaceful. My friends, my family, my lovelife is stable. Though there are a few problems, it's not that big to rant about. But since I have nothing else to say, and for the sake of humoring you with my small scale problems, I'll type em' here. 


I don't know what to say to my bestfriend to cheer him up, or even just make him feel that this is not his karma. I feel like I'm a useless friend for letting him feel like crap about himself. We recently reconciled for our first major fight, but it seems like I've lost the ability to make him feel better. I always make him feel better. Even if it's his fault, I make him feel self-righteous, but right now, NOTHING. I have nothing to say to tell him that he doesn't deserve this and that he shouldn't torture himself over this. I know he keeps trying to keep a straight face and tell everyone that he's okay but I know deep inside that everything's screwed up. The girl says that they just need space and personally, I think she's right. But that doesn't mean that they shouldn't remain as friends. Mark loves her. I haven't seen him like this for a very long time and even though they aren't a couple right now, I believe that eventually, they will be. She's the only girl that I'm in favor for and I'm wishing---hoping that this would be fixed. That way, Mark will be happy again. And I can feel that I've helped in some way. 'Coz right now, I feel like a very crappy, useless bestfriend. 


Kat has dengue. I'm worried about her. She's got a load of problems on her head right now and with this comes her unexpected sickness. She's confined in a hospital and I'm problematic about when to visit because I can't find the time. I must find a way to visit her. At least if I see her, my worry would subside because I'll know that she's okay. :| Wow, I noticed, I'm very clingy with my friends. 


It's gone. My love for him is gone, and I'm not used to it. My whole high school life I believed that he was the one, that I cannot find anyone else. But here I am, wondering why I feel so empty. Once that feeling went away, I feel like there's something missing inside of me. Of course, not all the love is gone. There's some left, the amount of friendship. The love that is left is for the friendship and for the fact that I did love him, and we did have memories. Those memories will be locked up in my heart forever. 


I had the most BV day today. We just came from Subic and I slept around 11-ish? Well sadly, I woke up at 6am because no one was able to wake me up. (FYI, alarms don't work with me) I was able to leave the house around 6:15 and huraaah!, traffic started from Susana Heights. (BTW, I rode the Cher transport for the very first time) Anyway, I closed my eyes and just let the music from my phone fill my head. When we passed by the sucat area, we started smelling a foul smell, like a smoke coming from a unmaintained jeep. Once we step foot in Skyway, the bus overheated, thus stranding us in the middle of the sun's heat. We waited for a bus but every one of them was full, so we rode the bus-in-tow to Magallanes and waited for a bus there. Luckily, one came. (Another Cher Transport) Anyway, I was able to reach school around 10am. HAHA. I missed my Accounting class. THIS IS A FAILURE FOR ME. They discussed something and I wasn't there. Damn it, this is all my fault ---- and MMDA I might add. They're the people who declared this day a NO CODING day. Where they are under a stupid administration---peace out Homer Simpson supporters. Never liked him. 


Anyway, I must continue this tomorrow? I gotta go check on my brother if he's sleeping. :| TTFN. 


With much love, 

SABAAAW

Damn it. I haven't blogged about a lot of things. HAHAHA. This is the effect of being a college student. You've got loads of time, but you're sooooo TAMAD to type. HAHAHA. K, I'm so crazy. 


Anyway, I'm having loads of fun at school. I pass my exams, which is good because I want to shift to BS Accountancy! HAHA. I bond with my blockmates so I can have an equal amount of social life with my academics. LOL. Sh1t, sorry for the uselessness of this blog post. I'm so sabaw kasi e. HAHA. 


A girl randomly said thank you to me, which is weird. Haha. Maybe she's retarded or something. K, I'm so mean. >:) This is what she gets for not thinking for herself. And to think I called her once my friend. 


Sometimes I wonder if our friendship (Mark's and I) went back to normal. Hm, guess not. Nagbago na siya e. He's not the same Mark that I knew. Bahala na. At least we've patched things up. There just comes a time when everything falls apart and I have to deal with that. It's kind of easy naman e. 


K, random, I'M SO KILIG SA ENDLESS LOVE. HAHAHAHA. I'm so sabaw today so forgive me. LOL. 


I'll end your misery. I'll stop typing, promise. TTFN.