I don't matter

I have good news and bad news! Which one do you want to hear first? 

I guess the bad news first. Uh ~ my grades went down down down down. XDDD Let's just say I'm disappointed with my grades despite the fact that my general average went .06 points up. I just feel like I haven't worked hard enough. Grr. :| 

Good news is, I'm still the 1st honor in our class! :) That means, I still have a chance to get a laptop! One more quarter to go --- I promise I'll work hard for it. And yeah, another good news, he made it to the 2nd honor. :)) Oh yeaaaa~ our names will meet on the top ten list. Haha. 

Kaya bumababa grades ko e, puro lalaki nasa isip ko.♥

I guess I'd have to stop. I don't have anything else to write. :)) 

P.S. I saw Cesar Apolinario today. He was a guest speaker in the seminar I attended. Haha. 

Disappointment

I have been a bad girl, so sue me. 

Let's just say, there's this guy who you like, and there's even a possibility that you'll fall in love with him. Of course you'll do anything to make him notice right? You'll do anything to befriend him and become close to him. But what if another person takes it the wrong way? What if they get mad at you because you keep on nearing this certain person. And that girl tells all her friends that you're implying that the guy likes you too ~ won't you get pissed off? I mean, I'd understand if your his girlfriend or something but, honestly, wala naman diba? It just irritates me. Since I heard about that rumor, I feel like I'm such a flirt. I feel like I've done something wrong and I don't deserve to fall in love. Oh c'mon, that was simply below the belt. I CAN'T EVEN GO NEAR HIM NOW. Because of YOU. I keep thinking, may magagalit, wag kang lalapit. Damn it. Feeling ko tuloy may restraining order na ko. Arg.  

Anyway, that wasn't the only thing that ruined my day. Let's hide girl and boy's name with Jojo ang Joja. :)) I kept on seeing Jojo and Joja hanging out. :)) I mean, were they really annoying me? Dismissal came and I saw them again. I even sat far away from them but Joja kept on looking my way. She looked like she won some lottery or something. C'mon, if you want some senior year romance, wag niyo na ko idamay ha? My life's peaceful already without you two. I swear. And please, Jojo ~ don't make me hope for nothing again. 

Okay, I better stop blabbering about this. It's making me sick on the inside. 

Distribution of report cards tomorrow. I'll blog about the results as soon as I get home. :) 

Kthxbye.

Dear John ♥

I just finished reading yet another novel by Nicholas Sparks. This is the kind of book which you pick up and you can never be able to put it down. It has a story that catches your heart, most especially if the lesson of the novel hits you straight in the heart. Haha, I know it did to me. :)) 

I should warn you, this after the two asterisks later, I'll be giving out spoilers in which you wouldn't gain the right amount of surprise once you read the book. So unless you really want to have the whole reading experience, then I suggest you stop reading. :)) Okay, so here it goes. 

** 
John Tyree was a rebel since he was a kid. Mostly because his father was submissive to him and all he cared about was collecting coins. Not long after highchool, John enlisted in the army wherein he turned into a man. He learned about maturity and all that stuff. He now understood what his father meant to him and well, bottom line is that joining the army was good for him. When he had a leave, he mostly spent the time on the beach, surfing, since he and his father were not much of speakers. He saw a girl walking by and he was struck by her beauty. I don't know, maybe fate interrupted so when the girl's bag fell down to the sea, John went to go retrieve it. That's how they met. 

The girl's name was Savannah Lynn Curtis. 

I guess they hit it off and not long after they met, they fell in love. And that was when John knew he was in deep trouble. He was leaving in a few days. Army duty yet again. 

Distance did some good to Savannah and John's relationship. John's love grew stronger and so did Savannah's. But sometimes when everything's perfect, something comes along and ruins it. 

The original plan was after a few months of enlistment, John would come home and they would get married and spend their lives together forever, but the 9/11 incident happened. And that was the time John was obliged to enlist on yet two more years. From then on, Savannah grew more distant. She wrote every other week, not the usual every 7 days. John was growing suspicious but said nothing. 

When a war broke at Iraq, John and his team went to help. John was devastated because of the blood that sprawled within his sight. He was disturbed with the sight and all he sought now was the love of Savannah. Once he received the letter of Savannah, he was beaming ~ but the details of that letter devastated him.

Unforunately, Savannah was in love with someone else. 

Because of this, John enlisted in the army again even though all his friends retired. He only went home when his father's condition was going bad and he needed John by his side. John spent more time with his father and with that, his love for him grew. But again, John experienced loss. His dad left him with nothing but the coins that made his whole life and a single picture of them together, wherein they were the happiest father and son in the world. 

John sought for Savannah's care. He looked for her and once he found her, that void wasn't filled. Unfortunately, Savannah was married to Tim, a childhood friend of Savannah. John met Tim not long after he met Savannah. And from the moment he saw Tim, he knew that he was also in love with Savannah.

Savannah didn't live a fantastic life coz' Tim acquired melanoma and her life went downhill from that day. Tim told John that Savannah's love for him never disappeared and that when he dies, he wants him to take care of Savannah. That was when John realized that true love isn't just about being happy with the one you love. It's about making the one you love happy despite the fact that you might not be in his or her happiness. 


That day, John said goodbye to Savannah, promising that she will never see him again. And shortly after, John sold his Dad's coin collection in order to give money for the treatment of Tim. 


Ending? Tim lived and had a wonderful life with Savannah, while John watched Savannah from afar ~ knowing that he'd do that forever, coz' his love for her will remain til' the end. 


***

SPOILERS END HERE! 
 
I'm yet another chick, falling in love with a book. :))
READ IT OKAAAY?

Don't jump to conclusions. :)

I haven't blogged about stuff since January 24. Hm, I guess I have a lot to fill you in about. :)) 

My exam scores are ~ uhh. Yeah, I guess that's the word to describe it. Haha. I always fail when it comes to the third quarter exams. It's like a yearly tradition. :P I am doubting my top 1 spot in our class. GOODBYE LAPTOP. :) Haha. If I don't make the number one spot, then I have to say goodbye to that effin' laptop, unlike other people, I have to earn my riches. :)

The week just passed by coz' apparently we didn't have classes. :)) We just spent our free time playing uno and practicing for our field demo. On Wednesday, I attended a seminar on global warming and climate change with Jane, Rochelle, Kate, Osang, Dom, Tari, Joana and Reymarc. Later that afternoon, the acoustic band competition took place. We made banners for Hue Turn, Reymarc and Tari since they were participants for that said contest. Too bad they didn't win, but at least they did their best. :) It was just a matter of the subjectivity of a certain person. Haha. :)) Peace guys. :) 

And yeah, I go something to tell you. Well, I was emotional last night coz' I thought he didn't appreciate what I did on that band thing. I was telling Kat, wala na ata talaga kong pag-asa dun. lahat na lang ng gusto ko, di pwedeng maging akin. And then I was startled when a chat box appeared. It was a simple hi from him but it made me scream on the inside. He wanted to thank me for what I did, and that was enough to make me hope for something again. :)) We talked about stuff and I swear, it's not impossible for me to fall in love with this guy. :))

I watched Kimerald's Paano na Kaya yesterday. :)) It was a nice movie. I related to some of the scenes. And yeah, before I forget, hindi sa amin ni mark. :)) Posible pang sa amin ni pagong. :)) I know we weren't bestfriends but we were close to that. Right? :P Any, I suggest you watch it. It's not a worthless movie, though it has a rushed ending. :)) 

I guess I have to stop typing. These details are useless to you readers. :)) 

Oh yeah, 

P.S. I hope you could read this. One question girl. 
How can we respect your decision when you gave up on our friendship that we built for more than 3 years? That's just *sorry for the word* BULLSHIT. 

Goodbyeuh guys. :)) 
Guguluhin ko pa si ano. Invi e. :))

Hoes over bros

January 23, 2010 

It was the best day ever. :) Nuvali is the most perfect place to escape from exams and the like. Anyway, the day was tiring but full of fun and enjoyment. Jane, Sherwin, Kat and I went to Biñan to buy the clear wayfarers. After that, we went to Kat's house. We hung out at her room and did some crazy stuff. :)) We practiced the dance moves for our field demo and we made a video! Haha. After that, Kat's father drove us to Nuvali where we fed some fish and circled the vicinity while riding a bike. :)) We had loads of fun, and a thought came to our minds. Why don't we have a class outing in that place? It's not some mall or some private pool but at least it's a place where we can relax. :)) 

Jane, Sherwin, Kat ~ sa uulitin! :)) Magimbita tayo ng iba! :)) 


Okay, so I guess I really need to blog about this. I promised myself that I won't stoop down to this level of immaturity but I guess I don't have a choice. Haha. We're not mad or anything, we just want you to understand our side of the story. I guess nothing was cleared up when we talked to you. I think what we said had a different meaning in your point of view. Well, here ~ to clear things out. 


We're not ignoring you and we're not leaving you out. There are just some conversations wherein you literally can't jive in. It's the matter of different interests. For example, I can't relate with your PBB talk coz' I don't watch it. And if that isn't the case, well, I'm sorry to say this but this was bound to happen. Don't you realize that you were absent in some parts of our everyday life? Of course we've talked about things that you don't know. We might have told stories that are interesting but you weren't there. We understand that you were with your boyfriend that time but please, don't go blaming us that you can't relate to the topics at hand. Honestly, it was really bound to happen. 

We're not making you choose between us and your boyfriend but to you, it seems that way. If you really want to balance your time with us and your time with your boyfriend, well I've got a suggestion. But before I tell you that, lemme' ask you, do you really need to spend every minute of the day with your boyfriend? I mean, like EVERY minute, every second of every day? Well, if you do, then this suggestion won't work for you. I suggest that both you and your boyfriend make time for your friends. Don't you notice that he hasn't been hanging out with his best boy buds coz' he's busy spending his lunch breaks with the girls? I mean, why don't you spend time with us and he spends time with his friends, that way, it's balanced. All we're asking is that you shouldn't be with him every time that he's free.  I know that the end of our high school life is near, and when college comes, you won't have that much time with each other, but that doesn't mean that your relationship won't work out. I mean, I'm not a relationship expert but due to what I've seen around me, you don't need to be always together when you love each other. Sometimes it's better to go on a day without the person you love, so by the time you see him, you're both longing for each other. Okay, so if you think this suggestion's stupid, then fine, it's okay with us. At least we tried giving you something to work with. Again, we're not forcing you to do this suggestion of mine. If you have different strategy, then we'll see if it works out. 


And yeah, I want to point out one thing. This will be the last time I'll blog about my friends. It's just wrong to blog about it instead of confronting them. I'm sorry to say this but it is in a way bit immature. Don't you think it hurts us to know that you have something against us through this stupid blog? Don't you think we've been trying to understand your situation since the start of the destruction of this friendship? Don't you think it hurts us to read about stuff in your blog telling us that you're ready to replace us as your friends? I mean, we've been working so hard to make this friendship work but I guess all the work we've done is useless. If you really want us to understand you, then you've got to learn to understand us. It's not supposed to be one-sided. Friendship is never one-sided. And if you can't deal with that, then ignore us all you want. Drop us if you want, but don't go blaming us for our friendship that was lost. 


You were never a victim. You just planted onto your mind that we never understand you. Try understanding us, and we'll see what happens.  Think about it.

Defeat

And when I thought I won the battle, I stabbed myself. 

This day sucks, bigtime. I haven't told my friends about this coz' I know they would be disappointed in me. My big plan of forgetting him faultered once I saw him today. I don't know why but the feeling was back. It's not as strong as before but something's still there. I thought I was over this shit but I guess there are some days that I simply don't mind him at all, but the feeling remains. Ugh, I am confused with everything now. I thought I was falling for another guy but I can't do that unless I forget about him. I don't want this guy to be a rebound coz' he's doesn't deserve to be hurt. 

Dang it. I need to forget about this. I literally haven't studied yet. :| And with this going on in my mind, I don't think I can concentrate on studying. :|


I want to go to the battle, but I can't. 
Sorry pare, I wish you the best. 


*LOL. Kung magsalita naman ako, para namang gusto nia nandon ako. :| 


Got to study.

Pictures. :))

COOL RIGHT? :)))


Eto pa,






Resulta ng pagkamiss ko kay syota. :)))) Loveyo. :)