CRAP.

Crap. That's right, I feel like effing crap. :)) It was pure stupidity to believe that something was definitely going on between us. Yeah, I think he's even keeping his distance. Uh ~ reason why? Mark told him -- scratch that, SHOUTED to the whole class that I'm in love with him. Yeah, that was embarassing, but the worst part of it is that he's ignoring me. Ugh. Why am I making such a big deal out of this?! :| Okay, I'll shut up. 


I don't know what else to say. Uh ~ did I tell you that I gave samson a retreat letter? It was like an I love you goodbye type of speech. hahaha. I guess I grew tired of the game we --- I was playing. :)) 


Gaa, I can't put off my nerves. I keep on dreaming about waiting for the results of the UPCAT. Like waiting for it while I'm awake is not enough! GAAAHD. It just irritates me coz' I need to wait for it for one more month. BLAAA. I DO NOT WANT TO GO TO DLSU. It's not the school, it's the people who got accepted. OKAAAY, bitter much?! :)) 


I hope pare and I get over all this evasiveness. I can't stand it if we're not speaking to each other. That kinda uh ~ depresses me. 


GUYS, LEMME REMIND YOU, HOES OVER BROS. 
Friends muna bago lalaki? Kay? :) 


Byeow. :))

SHITTYNESS :))))

I am the world's worst blogger. :)))) It's been a long time since I've written here and it disappoints me. Haha. I'll make it up to you. Haha. :)) I already back in school. Haha. And honestly, I'm making the most out of it. I simply can't escape the fact that in less than three months, my highschool life is over. I can't imagine my life without meeting my highschool friends and deep inside, I don't want to forget about them in the future. I want them to be my friends until I take my last breath. :)))) Okay, this is dramatic. Hahaha. Anyway, my year started well. Especially my first day back at school, once he entered, I felt my heart beating slower and faster at the same time. Haha. I don't even know if I'm falling for him because he's himself or I'm falling for him because I want to forget about the skater dood. :)) All I know is that I'm falling in love with him ~ no matter what the reason is. :) 

O yea, I have good news and bad news. Uh~ good news is I passed the DLSUCET, bad news is I didn't get in to the accountancy department. Haha. Another bad news? Skater dood passed the exam. Haha. And when I thought I could forget him once I'm in college, hahaha. Damn, I'm waiting for the UPCAT results. If I pass that, then I'll be far away from him. :))) Okay, bitter much? :))) 

I'll continue this later. Apparently, my dad's trying to get into cyberspace. :)) TTFN. :))) 

The day before Christmas

In less than 6 hours, it'll be christmas, the birth of our savior Jesus Christ. :) Let's celebrate for that day is considered holy. :) I just realized that I haven't blogged about stuff for a while now. Haha. I don't think I have a lot to tell you. Uh ~ let's start with the Christmas Party. We had loads of fun! He was playing the guitar again and haaay, I forget about the other boy whenever I'm with him. Haha. Maybe I'm in the verge of moving on. Haha. Any, after the party, Nadine, Carla and I went to Enchanted Kingdom. Samuel, Jervin, Michelle, Joanna, Erwin, Dodong and some volleyball  boys joined us. We had fun even though there were a lot of people. Imagine, we were there from 3:30pm to 12:00 am and we were only able to go on 6 rides? Haha. DEFINE PILA. XD I want to thank Cito for the ticket. I saved loads of money because of that. :) Ayun, basically, other days were typical. And oh, I bought a new phone! I finally replaced my 2 year long Motorola L7. Haha. I love my new phone. It's a Nokia X3. I don't wanna post a picture here so if you wanna know what it looks like, search for it in the world wide web. :) 

Yeah, so maybe right now I'm feeling confused. You see, I think I'm falling for a certain guy but I'm afraid I'm just using him to cover up my love for this other guy. Aba, I've been in love with this other guy for 3 whole years and I don't know if I can move on that easily. Lalo na, he never loved me back. One sided love, ika nga. I want to forget about him but the only time I forget about him is when I see the certain guy. Haha. I know, It's difficult to discuss without names. XD Any, you get my point, right? 


So, I wanna wish you a merry christmas! :D 
3 days to go and I'll be 16! :) 


Love yo. :)

A day of bursting emotions. :)

I wanna tell you that a lot of beautiful things happened today, but it ended pretty bad. I went to school with allergies I couldn't find the cause of. Filipino time, we checked the papers and my score got me depressed. 30/50 isn't good enough, especially for my parents. Anyway, my reasearch score cheered me up coz' I only had 3 mistakes. I also learned a valuable lesson, I am not going to let anyone copy from me, EVER. There was an incident a while ago that a person copied from me and she got an even higher score compared to mine. Psh. Lesson learned. When we had our morning break, I saw him again. DANG IT, ba't ba siya ganon kagwapo? I mean he looks normal to everyone else but to me, he's to die for. Malakas talaga tama ko sa kanya. After that, I couldn't stop thinking about him. I even wrote TURTLE:SMILEY:DIMPLES:inserthisnamehere over and over again in a yellow paper. HAHA. I'm obsessed, I know. And when lunch came, that was the embarassing part. I was drinking pepsi when I noticed that he was at my back. My friends were teasing me and they were slowing down so we can go with their walk. When I saw his face, I couldn't help it, nabulunan ako. Malapit ko na mabugahan ng pepsi kung sino man yung nasa harap ko. I don't know if he saw it but it was embarassing. And then when Jemil teased me about it, she hit her head on the fire extinguisher cabinet. We were laughing our asses off coz' of that horrible mishap. Haha.

We had our confession today. I asked God to give me a sign. If I see him more then once after dismissal, I shouldn't forget him coz' there's still hope, and guess what, I saw him 7 times! And when I asked God to give me a sign that I should still hold on to my love for him, I asked him if he texts me, even considering a gm, even once, I should hold on. Guess what, he texted me 7 times today. AND IT WASN'T A GM. This just goes to show that God forbids me to forget him. LOL. 

BTW, the thing I said about this day not ending well. Well, I saw him with her . They were really close and I was wondering and thinking to myself if there's something between them. I know a lot of dirt about him, so this, I can handle. :) I'll love him no matter what. 

Bye na. :) My mom's gonna check her Cafe World. Addicted Fool. XD 

Neno's Award. Thanks Ate Irish. :)

First things first, I would really like to say thanks to Ate Irish for giving me this award. Haha. Like her, I don't know what this award it but I'm still grateful. :) Thanks a lot. :D It means a whole lot to me. :) 


Moving on.. 
The rules and regulations for this award are:
1. As a dedication for those who love blogging and love to encourage friendships through blogging.
2. To seek the reasons why we all love blogging.
3. Put the award in one post as soon as you receive it.
4. Don’t forget to mention the person who gives you the award.
5. Answer the award’s question by writing the reason why you love blogging.
6. Tag and distribute the award to as many people as you like.
7. Don’t forget to notify the award receivers and put their links in your post.

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Why do I blog? Could I tell you I just feel like it? Nope, I guess not. Anyway, I think the real reason why I blog is that I can express my feelings freely and even if I can't tell my friends personally, they'll know what's going on in my life. It's a relief to know that you can rant about something and no one's there to tell you that it's stupid to rant about those kind of things. It's a relief to know that you can vent your anger upon somebody who won't lift a finger against you. I also love blogging coz' after a few years and/or months, I can go back to my previous blogs and see what kind of angst I had back then. It's amusing to read about my boy troubles and how I was so immature back then. I treat my blog like an online diary where there are no secrets. I may hide names because of privacy but everything's here. Nothing's is to be left out because I want to keep those memories forever. :) It feels amazing when you realize that a lot of people read about your rants and they have a smile among their face. It feels amazing to see that people make the time to comment about that particular blog post. You feel special to them, and that I think are the reasons why I love blogging. 

I hope the fun continues. :) I love you all. :) 

I'm passing this blog on to the following people, because I love them and I think they deserve it. :) 
Ate Abbi 
Edzhie 
Jemil 
Katrina 
Steffie 
 

Whatever you do, I will still love you. :)

I should be doing my homework but I couldn't stand not writing here. :) It was a fun day today. Finally, I was able to go to school. I learned something really important today. MASAMANG MAG-ABSENT NG TATLONG ARAW. It was like I was in a different world. I didn't know the lessons and they had notes I didn't have. Good thing I used this day to get back on track. If I want that laptop, I gotta work hard for it. :) So after this stupid blog post, I'm doing my homework. XD 

I also want to say sorry to my lovable friends, TWINko, SYOTAko, and TWINKLEko. Sorry ah? You know what I mean. I didn't mean it naman eh. Sorry sorry sorry! Love you so muccchh. :) 

I found something out today. I can't tell you here, in fact, I can't tell a soul. I admit, it changed my perspective on his personality but the feelings didn't change. It's still here, it's all here in my heart. I still love him but I gotta learn how to stop. This won't go anywhere. :| 

Okay, enough drama. I really need to do my homework. But don't worry, I'll blog again tomorrow. :) 

Till next time. :)

And I always come back to YOU. :)

Just got home from my 3 day relaxation in Baguio. Haha. I desperately needed it coz for the past few days I was sick and I didn't know why. Good thing, after that Baguio trip, I felt better. Maybe I just needed a rest from everything that's been bothering me. I feel so much better that I'm going to school tomorrow! I missed my friends, Ambrose and a whole lot more. :) May dala po akong pasalubong, wag kayong mag-alala. Anyway, I have no idea what they did those days when I was gone and I want to catch up. I can't let somebody take my number one spot in class coz' my laptop's on the line. I need to be on top till the fourth quarter so my parents can buy me a laptop. That's the condition, and I just need to abide with it. :) 

Pacquiao won again. I was able to know through the radio. Ang galing nung mga nagsasalita. They were able to describe every punch, every jab, every fall of both legends. It was an awesome fight. It lasted for 12 rounds and on the last round, it was declared a technical knock-out. Unfortunately for Miguel Cotto, the referee thought his body couldn't take anymore. :) Pacquiao brought pride to the Philippines, once again. :) 

After everything that has happened, I recognized something. He doesn't care about me. That's declared a fact. I fell sick and he didn't even ask, even once, how I was doing. When I personally texted him, he just laughed at me and took pity over the fact that I couldn't watch TV. It was depressing that even for the fact thet we're friends, he didn't care about me. It made me sad but it did teach me something. That I'm waiting in vain for nothing. Whatever I do now won't change anything. He'll never love me the way I love him. I don't even know if he loves me as a friend. Maybe I should be contented with whatever we have right now and forget about everything. It's a useles endeavor, I learned that the hard way. 

Anyway, I blabbering again. I promised I would keep my blogs short this time. haha. :) 

Here are some pics from my baguio trip. :) 

 

 

 

 

 

I know, madami. Just bear with it. XD :)